SPEAK OUT
Posted: 12/23/2009 10:17:58 AM
I spent some time recently with a former NHL player and friend of mine at a recent NCAA Junior A Showcase event discussing the rise in abuse and harassment in hockey. He was initially referencing Theo Fleury’s life in the last 3 months and the release of his book “Playing With Fire.” In case you do not remember or may not be familiar with the NHL Career and story of Theo Fleury. He was one of the games fiercest competitors for nearly two decades in a troubled Hall of Fame level career that was set off balance at the age of 14 in Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan, playing hockey when he was offended by now convicted sexual offender Graham James. It’s a must read book for every hockey leader, parent and coach.
Our conversation grew from the sexual abuse sustained by Fleury to less serious but still important topics of bullying, physical abuse, emotional abuse and neglect. “Is it not our duty and responsibility as coaches and sport leaders to safeguard the well being of its participants?” exalted my NHL Alumni Friend. “You know as well as I do Hoody that the depth of this problem is greater than most hockey leaders want to talk about.” “Hoody you should “Speak Out” people would listen to you!” “You have a voice and I think it would be received positively,” he insisted.
It was a long bus ride home as I thought about what my friend was getting at within our very brief, yet passionate conversation.
So my friend I accept the challenge.
We all need to collectively take steps to prevent the maltreatment of our volunteers, coaches, parents, officials and players. The driving Characteristic of abusers and harassers is their abuse of their position of power. The Emotional Abuse of our hockey family needs to stop. Ridiculing, name calling and on going psychological attacks need to be eliminated once and for all. Physical abuse like hitting, face mask grabbing, senseless exercise, hazing and the like need never enter our sport. Neglect of players through allowing inadequate equipment or pressure to play while injured or not supervising our kids needs to be stopped. Bullying is the expression of one’s power by humiliating other needs to be stood up to. Yelling, blaming, threatening, cyber threats, unauthorized youtube posts, repeated insults and denying one’s accomplishments all need to be removed from our sport. Harassment is a definite violation of our Human Rights as protected by constitution. Worst of all we need to protect our players from Sexual abuse. I pray for Theo and Sheldon Kennedy. We are too trusting and naïve. We need to work harder at developing better educational programs and growing awareness.
One thing is for sure when I played hockey I could have done without a lot of these issues myself. My players think I’m making the story up about having to continually ride home after a road loss in 1982 in the WHL without eating, in our equipment, with the heat turned off on the bus in the middle of winter and then practicing as soon as we got back to the rink. I should have Spoke Out!